BDSM Party Agenda 

So the local BDSM club is having an ugly sweater party for it's Holiday Event. Of course many liberties will be taken with this theme. Neither my SO nor I own these kinds of sweaters nor desire to wear them. SO suggested I could cut one off of them at said event. That might be fun but I am concerned about it given the event. Open to suggestions if anyone has a way to stay in theme and yet not have to wear said sweater?

Emotions are hard is something we say to our kid regularly. It helps identify the source of their anxiety and that it is OK to feel off in some manor. I really wish I had a phrase for that in my own brain right now. I could use it.

Consent: Educating myself 

I am on a quest to learn more and broader perspectives on consent. It's been a journey. I've enrolled in and completed a couple of classes, I've read 3 books so far (another on the agenda). I started listening to podcasts about consent and with a few really notable exceptions holy crap there's a lot of terrible stuff out there from people that should know better. I don't even know where to start.

Better(ish) Mental Health 

Had some good moments with therapist. She pointed out some of the hyperbolic language in that study that really had me flipping out. She was well versed in the subject and essentially told me that it was right I was always going to have that response but I could mitigate or change how I responded to it much like I've done with other elements of my life. We kind of set the other event aside to hash out in the future. I have some work ahead but I'm less panicked.

I don't know, but heavy emotional stuff. 

Not only wasn't it accidental but the person who did it (a very long time ago) is a sex educator now. I have a lot of positive things to say about the education she provides and yet I realize that I've been over compensating for a trauma that she inflicted on me. I really believe that she's not the person who did that and that she's grown, evolved in her view of the world and become better. I don't know what to do with the anger I'm feeling about it.

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I don't know, but heavy emotional stuff. 

That's all up in the air. I don't even know what to do with it. Then I hit a breakthrough and realize that one of my formative sexual experiences that replays in my head was totally non-consensual. I have for years used that event in my life as motivation to make sure I was working towards good consensual interactions because I thought of it as an accidental boundary violation but it dawned on me that it wasn't accidental. (more)

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I don't know, but heavy emotional stuff. 

I don't even know what to do on that one. I handed my partner the write up and it was like watching a light go on in her head. She saw exactly what I saw and gave voice to it saying this is exactly what my frustrations with our relationship have looked like. She's awesome mind you, she totally told me that she was glad she had a way of seeing what I was experiencing. Yet I am sick to my stomach about it. (more)

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I don't know, but heavy emotional stuff. 

There are a series of drug suggestions and I'm a biochemist, I know those drugs. I know precisely what they do and no fucking way. I'm not doing that to my brain. Fuck that. Hard stop, hard limit NO. So what does that mean? Does that mean I continue to put my family through the stress of dealing with me treating them this way? The clinical write ups are like my worst nightmare of how my interactions could be taken. (more)

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I don't know, but heavy emotional stuff. 

Then I nearly threw up. I didn't know I'd been treating people that way but the writing just jumps off the page at me like a smack in the face. It gives me insight into why some of my personal connections have been what they have been. Good right? Healthy to know at least? Sure but then I read the therapist write ups which are clear that therapy isn't effective as a method of dealing with the issue, in fact pretty clearly isn't. (more)

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I don't know, but heavy emotional stuff. 

I hit at least three emotional landmines in the last three days. I am aching on a lot of levels and need to spew some of it. So I found a community locally after trying for the last year and it's kind of great. That really put me on a high. The crash was running face first into a diagnosis of a mental issue I've never had a name for and it blindsided me. I read it and read the description and it was like reading my own biography. (more)

BDSM related 

I updated my fetlife profile for the first time in forever because one of the local groups uses it and we had a lot of fun with them. I had almost deleted that account because of how badly run fetlife is.

Last night was very good. Got to meet a lot of people who were genuinely kind. Got super surprised by the socially aware maximum security prison guard. He had a lot of great things to say about race, gender, sexuality and incarceration of people. I was utterly shocked.

Weekend Plans NSFW 

Was going to an orchestra performance tonight ... really wasn't feeling it tonight. Suddenly out of nowhere got an invite to a BDSM play party by some very fun people. With pictures of their newly equipped dungeon. SO who is normally the introvert of the two of us says "Yeah I feel way more like doing that." What a great turn of events.

In the list of things I thought I'd never do in my life... this ranks up there. Yet there I was at the Hot Wheels Monster Truck Show.

So my first Nor'easter: Eurythmics 

Here comes the rain again
Falling on my head like a memory
Falling on my head like a new emotion
I want to walk in the open wind
I want to talk like lovers do
I want to dive into your ocean
Is it raining with you

youtu.be/TzFnYcIqj6I

Snapped this when I was about to get on the train home. I find Grand Central Station really gorgeous.

Pokemon Trapinch 

Pretty good community day!

Amazing Night NSFW 

What an amazing night. Out in another city for a night of amazing cocktails followed by really rough and violent sex. She’ll need to cover up some bruises from bite marks in very visible spots and I’ll need to something about a hickey but listening to her orgasm so hard she collapsed in exhaustion afterward is worth some cosmetic issues. Goodness needed that.

Selfie Collage of Pictures. Eye Contact etc. 

Also I own more than 5 t-shirts... really, I never noticed until now that I tend to grab the same t-shirts when I hit the trail.

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Selfie Collage of Pictures. Eye Contact etc. 

My interface is being weird, can someone tell me if I successfully made that picture marked as sensitive content?

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Selfie Collage of Pictures. Eye Contact etc. 

I feel like this is the photo equivalent of how I spent my summer? I spend a lot of time on the trail, either on a bike or hiking. This summer I targeted waterfalls. I made it out to 12 different waterfalls this summer. Not sure how many more I'll be able to hit this fall before the snow stops me.

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Swingset.Social

We are swingers, polyamorous, sex positive, nonmonogamous, and accepting of any and all relationship practices. We are consent and kink aware. We welcome people of color and extend a specific welcome to black and indigenous people. We accept all sexual orientations (LGBTQIA+ inclusive) and gender identities.

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